1.
我成天就想打篮球，可我又不想花那么多功夫去练习。 【Basketball
is
life,
but
so
is
being
lazy. 】

2.
有时候我在打球时会感觉自己就像NBA的球员，可事实证明我只是个乱窜的菜鸟。 【I
sometimes
feel
like
an
NBA
player
on
the
court,
but
then
reality
kicks
in
and
I
realize
I'm
just
a
flailing
rookie. 】

3.
我的篮球技术就像是重新定义了最差的标准。 任何人都可以像麦迪那样打，就我一个人打得像尼克斯边缘球员。 【My
basketball
skills
redefine
the
epitome
of
suck.
Anyone
can
ball
like
Tracy
McGrady,
but
I'm
over
here
playing
like
a
Knicks
benchwarmer. 】

4.
我现在的球风，跟当初我会骑自行车时，同样可怜可悲。 【My
basketball
game
is
like
riding
a
bike
again,
except
it's
still
just
as
sad
and
pathetic. 】

5.
要是能够参加三分大赛，我肯定能创下历史性的成绩：花费三分钟时间，一次命中一次跑步和一次呕吐。 【If
there
was
a
three-point
contest
for
me,
I'd
set
a
record
for
combining
running
and
puking
in
a
three-minute
span. 】

6.
我真是太菜了。 上次场上脱鞋，球直接砸中了观众席. . . 不过我还是假装是美如画的后仰跳投。 【I'm
so
bad
at
balling.
Last
time
I
slipped
out
of
my
shoes,
and
the
ball
went
straight
into
the
bleachers. . . but
I
pretended
it
was
a
beautiful
fadeaway
jumper. 】

7.
我觉得我在场上就是个有着凌乱动作却不敢抛投的展示品。 【I'm
like
a
display
item
on
the
court
-
wild
card
spins
and
swirls,
but
no
guts
to
take
the
shot. 】

8.
篮球是一项我无能为力的运动。 太遗憾了，我可能永远无法超越曾经在生物实验室中顶球时的高峰。 【Basketball
is
the
one
sport
where
I
am
completely
useless.
It's
a
shame
I'll
never
peak
like
the
time
I
was
juggling
a
squash
in
bio
lab. 】

9.
打篮球有一个好处就是可以像一直跳绳那样锻炼你的跳跃能力。 可惜的是我的跳跃能力好像再也没有进步的余地了。 【One
good
thing
about
basketball
is
that
it's
like
jumping
rope
exercise
for
your
vertical.
Too
bad
for
me
there
is
no
more
room
for
improvement. 】

10.
我打球不是为了赢球，而是为了让大家看到一次媲美MVP的表演。 不过更多的时候只让大家看到了丑态百出的一面。 【I
don't
play
to
win,
I
play
to
put
on
an
MVP-worthy
performance.
But
most
of
the
time
it's
just
pure
clownery. 】

11.
至少我能做得很好的一件事情就是当我赢不了时，一定要让对手胜不骄，败不馁。 【At
least
one
thing
I'm
really
good
at
is
not
letting
my
opponents
get
too
cocky
or
too
depressed
when
they
beat
me. 】

1
2.
当我场上打出好的三分钟时，我的理想像是在进攻端化身步行者队里的Jrue
Holiday，防守端则是Andrew
Bogut，而在四十七分钟的其余时间里，我只是一只拖着九十公斤肉体的恐龙。 【My
dream
on
the
court
is
to
be
like
Jrue
Holiday
for
the
Pacers
on
offense
and
Andrew
Bogut
on
defense
-
for
three
minutes.
The
other
forty-seven
I'm
just
a
lumbering
dinosaur
with
200
lbs
of
flesh
to
drag
around. 】

1
3.
打篮球有点像游泳：确切地，我打球的方式像是一只淹死的鲸鱼在海里苦苦挣扎。 【Playing
basketball
is
like
swimming
-
specifically,
I
play
like
a
drowning
whale
thrashing
around
in
the
ocean. 】

1
4.
我觉得我应该去接受一些篮球方面的培训，尽管我还是更欣赏自己懒散的打球风格。 【I
feel
like
I
should
take
some
basketball
lessons,
but
I
also
enjoy
the
lazy,
bad
style
I
play
with. 】

1
5.
我的打球风格像是一只贪吃的小猪，在场上到处乱窜，绝不会让你感到无聊。 【My
basketball
style
is
like
a
hungry
little
pig
-
running
in
circles
and
ensuring
you'll
never
be
bored
watching
me. 】

1
6.
我的篮球技术就像是我从硬币掉到地上时捡起来的一样拉稀。 【My
basketball
skills
are
like
the
coin
I
pick
up
off
the
floor
after
dropping
it
-
definitely
crappy. 】

1
7.
只要我在场上，你就会感到压力对比似乎减轻了。 看到我的表现，你就肯定会感到‘哦，原来一个人打球也不会太难啊’。 【When
I'm
on
the
court,
you
feel
the
pressure
of
performing
easing
off.
Watching
me
play
is
like
thinking
'oh
okay,
one
person
playing
basketball
doesn't
seem
too
difficult'. 】

1
8.
我的篮球对手们：恭喜你们在我的手下取得胜利，一定会成为你们生涯最值得庆贺的一次胜利之一。 【My
basketball
opponents:
congrats
on
beating
me,
it'll
probably
be
one
of
the
most
celebrated
wins
of
your
career. 】

1
9.
类比于我的篮球表现，我发誓我应该从抱起小狗这件事上就该放弃做任何涉及双手的运动。 【In
relation
to
my
basketball
performance,
I
swear
I
should
have
given
up
any
sports
involving
hands
after
being
able
to
hold
onto
a
small
puppy. 】

20.
打篮球对我来说就像是在尝试厨艺
-
真正被人检验的结果，只是那些做得好吃的菜色和友谊的胜利。 【Playing
basketball
for
me
is
like
cooking
-
the
only
real
result
that's
tested
is
whether
or
not
the
food
tastes
good,
and
whether
we
win
or
lose
has
nothing
to
do
with
it. 】